The coffee brews

And you know just by the smell

what I’m going through

Drawing warmth through lips slightly patent

The caffeine keeps me waking

Justifies the shaking

Over you

 

One round pill 

to stop the shaking

A shot of booze to stop the aching

The song timed to the beating of my heart

Precarious rhythm bound to stop 

Here I am sitting all alone

In the dark

 

Six bronze strings

With too much tension 

Needing relief and the action is low

An anticipated note resonates through

The vibration stirs deep inside

Fretting down you close your eyes

Imagining your hands on me

Vibrato

 

In a room

Some distance away 

Not privy to the sound you play

Unaware of the notes lofting in the air 

There lies a girl, unamused by the start of the day

Too numb to feel, too sad to sing

She takes her coffee

Black

 

I just want to ride life in your wake

Block the arctic winds blowing my world

Blowing the tides I cannot change

 

I just want to ride life in your wake

Take a little resistance off the tidal surge of my mind

Let me sleep at peace today

 

I just want to ride life in your wake

When it's giving me more than I think I can take

When it's all fading away like the sand slipping through my hands 

 

Ruins wasted, souls rusting in my palms of my hands

When it's all slipping away like the sands of time

I try to hold on but that's the life that slips away

The solitude of the mountain

The loneliness you cannot see

Summed up to letters and papers

The cheapest things don't come free

 

Night gives our efforts meaning

You sleep with head on familiar pillows

While you are chasing your rabbits 

We sit up chasing our dreams

While we silently prepare those who never dare to dream again

 

We hold our heads high

tassel covers over bloodshot eyes

Our eyes dry from the tears deprived

All meaning lost in the goodbyes 

 

 

 

You're the only one whose smile makes me forget what is right

I struggle with my belief like I struggle with the night 

I struggle with my desperation to have you touching me in this light

 

As we walk up to the cabin

It's a certain kind of feel 

A letting go and a giving up 

A questioning of all I hold real

 

Either way I lose 

So I give way to you

I give way to you

 

The autumn air blows the same temperature as my soul

My skin glows amber, camouflaged by the leaves beneath my feet

It sounds like burning embers 

I'm unsure from which

 

The ground gives way with every step 

like I give way to you

If the sin doesn’t burn me black

You'll still drown me in my blues

 

Either way I lose 

So I give way to you

I give way to you

 

The night transpires to day 

Skipping over any civility this dawn could offer

The day radiates through me like truth

Like a little girl in daydreams 

I hide my eyes under the cover of you 

And I fall asleep, wake me in the night 

 

 

 

 

Miles Ahead

Should I refrain 

Mountains, too afraid to climb

Ledges sharp and steep 

Falling, shadows over all my aspirations 

Looking up for inspiration

But is anything worth the trek

Just to say it’s been done

Just to have to walk back down again 

Bragging rights soon forgotten

And in time I’ll return to lust again

The void still unfulfilled

 

The sky, of hues so happy

The stars, shined triter than you 

The flesh of skin never looked quite right

Stained glass windows like lens to my mind 

Like art disguised as truth 

Even the broken looks beautiful

And you stare until the image doubles 

Knowing it’ll never appear that way again

 

Miles ahead of desperation 

Hands rusted in defeat of the climax you couldn’t reach

You don’t use them anymore

 

And you lay it on me like salve to a broken wound 

You never asked but you know, the truth I’m not inclined to say

And every descending glance affirms it even more

Words covey little, against the transparency of a soul

 

So I climb, a mountain too vertiginous

To a pinnacle I know I’ll never reach 

But it’s driven by compulsory force   

Every move aches with purpose

Every pull feels like pushing veracity away

I’ll die with my ambition, but at least I didn’t stay

 

Miles ahead of desperation 

Hands bruised in defeat of the love I couldn’t reach

I don’t use them anymore